A Series of Upstead Events
by taylorandmacster10
Summary: Sent in by YOU the reader, this is a collection of one-shot, stand alone prompts surrounding our beloved couple on Chicago PD, Upstead. Comment or PM me and I will bring your ideas to life. Let's have some fun!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1- Ask And You Shall Receive

**A few things had to be moved around, and some other projects went on the back burner, but here we are at the start of some Upstead one shots. This was an idea I had a couple of months back and I'm equally glad and excited a lot of y'all supported this. Just like my other one shot story, I'm going to start this off and then I'm handing the reigns over to you. Now this premiere chapter comes from a prompt submitted in the other story. Think of this as a segway, a back door pilot if you will. **

**_Hulachick1102: I NEED a chapter of them actually dating and being together!_**

**So this one is a follow up to chapter 13 of ****_A Prompting Jay Halstead Style. _****If you haven't, go read it so you'll know the backstory of this chapter. Another adventure is about to begin. Let's do this.**

It had been forty days since the shooting, thirty days since he was released into the world, and tonight was the night they'd finally agreed upon. Hailey was standing in her closet, hair complete and make up on point, but the outfit was where she was boggled. He told her whatever was fine, which is the most guy response to date night attire ever. Guys had it easy, just wear jeans and either a button down or normal t-shirt and shoes. Women on the other hand had to deal with everything. Clothing, shoes, jewelry, even fragrance hinge on anything from the aesthetic of the building to what type of food was being served. Everything mattered and all elements had to be weighed. People can complain all they want, but it's a big deal and takes some time to put together the perfect date night outfit, especially when it's the very first one.

Hailey just stared into nothing for several minutes asking the clothing to say something at this point. She weighed dress or jeans, dressy pants or leggings and a sweater. Her phone chimed the fifteen minute warning, the reminder she set to know when to leave. She was behind schedule and had to make up time pronto. The old reliables were selected: leather jacket, tight jeans, a white t-shirt and boots. The realization that Jay's limited mobility was likely to restrict him to something casual struck her as she threw the clothing on. It wasn't that he couldn't get off the couch, but a couple of daily acts and movements were still coming along. She grabbed her purse, phone, key and CTA card before hesitating at the mirror a final time, accepting that this was as good as it was going to get for tonight. It was during the closing of the front door that the butterflies fluttered deep in her gut, which she found totally weird. This wasn't a first date with a stranger, but Jay, her partner of two years now. He was still the same person, and they still had the same relational dynamics, but maybe it was the start of something new, the potential for what this all meant. She shook her head, telling herself she was getting way ahead of stuff. The door was locked at a rapid rate and her late self bolted down the hallway, thankful she chose function over form in the shoe department.

…

It was Friday night in Chicago, and a rainy one at that. The spring snow from a month ago was washed away from the random monsoons of April. The month's hottest fashion accessory was a soaked trench coat paired with blown out umbrellas. It was a silly game counting how many poorly made umbrellas were out in the world. The look on people's faces when they realized their only line of defense was destroyed was an added bonus. It was a ten stop, one train change ride from Hailey's place to Jay's. Over the past month, Hailey had done this trek a couple dozens times now. She could do it in her sleep, and felt she had a couple of times. It became a routine, leaving her place before the sun was up to get to Jay before heading in to work, and then doing the routine backwards at night. Jay pestered her for doing all of that for him, but she fell into loving it. She suddenly, almost forcibly, became a morning person and he was a nice prize for her efforts. Most of the rides over we silent, but tonight was crowded, loud, and wet from the latest random soaking. She did her best to hide the giggle, noting she was the only dry person on the train, before turning to the scenery to squelch her humor.

The rain was dissipating allowing the fog to settle over the city. Lights were extra bright tonight, their reflection against the wet environment acting as neon puddles against the sidewalks and gutters. Hailey concluded that Chicago wears rain well, and any weather for that matter. For example, Atlanta looks crummy in the snow and Los Angeles is dismal in the rain. But Chicago can pull anything off and still be its' perfect, stunning self. It's the greatest city in the world, she concluded amongst the crowded, sopping wet car.

The train switch came and went, the stops clicked off in their normal succession. But Hailey swore things were taking longer that night. Every door opening was met with a foot tap and muttering/praying for things to get moving. Partly because she hated being late, but mostly she just wanted to see him and get this crazy idea of theirs on the road. It was that crazy phenomena where good things take forever to happen and bad things ignore the speed of time. Her cue to jump off arrived and she took it, speed walking and jogging down the stairs. She pushed through the crowds for two blocks before stopping at the entrance of his building and breathing. This was it, too late to turn back. The elevator was making its' descent when she waved to the superintendent, whom she had made a pseudo relationship with in recent days. He joyfully waved back with a greeting, doing a quick and friendly approval of her appearance, figuring out the reason for her presence tonight. The elevator chimed, she got on, and shook off the nerves as the car came to a stop.

"You've got to calm down," she told herself, boldly and quickly walking down the hall. She knocked, had the apology ready to fly out, but the scene on the other side of the door changed everything. She burst out laughing at his unruly hair. It was a disaster, like he rolled on a pillow for twenty minutes. And his face of panic and surprise really sealed the deal.

"Help," he spoke, face growing red over her continuous deep laughs. They stood like this for a minute, Jay hanging on the door while Hailey was bent over and looking for air. She pushed herself in after the second request for assistance, his excuse was that he tried.

"What did you do," she inquired?

"I can't really reach over my head yet so.."

"Ok, ok," she replied, using him past the family room into his bathroom. She was able to piece the series of events together: the hair dryer flung into the sink—still plugged in I might add—, the various hair products strewn all over the counter before ending at brushes, combs, and other odd objects. Clearly his attempt to reach the top of his head was a colossal fail. Upon reaching the end of the story she turned around and giggled, humored at his valiant but failed efforts. Jay shrugged before sighing in disappointment.

"Let's just hurry or we're going to be late." She instructed him to squat down into a crouch that looked like Kris Bryant's batting stance, picking up the product soaked brush and beginning the task of rectify his mop of a head. His hair was so stiff from everything being in it that Hailey concluded he'd end the night with zero hairs left on his head. She'd pull, he'd protest. She'd explain he did it to himself, he'd cave before the process began again. Ten minutes later things were back in their usual place. Jay looked relatively normal and the bathroom was restored to its' former clean glory. Shoes were adorned before completing the final scan. He still looked thin, stiff, and tired but the frailness had all but dissipated. With the scars and IV bruising covered, you'd have never guessed he played the staring role in a near death accident forty days ago. He was a normal guy doing typical things; a happy ending to a crazy last month. She ushered him out of the building before turning around to face the door, hearing the lock click against the key before passing it off to Jay.

"How do you shower," she inquired as they boarded the elevator.

"It's a process," he joked, painting a funny and odd picture in Hailey's mind. They reentered the world, soaking up its' dreary, humid night air before Jay took over the navigating. Three blocks later, at the corner of Washington and Wells, was when Hailey's curiosity spilled out.

"So where are we going?"

"It's a sur.." But he didn't get to finish because at that exact moment, a once still gutter puddle sprung to life thanks in part to a bus. Hailey's cat-like reflexes saved her from the wetness, Jay taking the brunt of things. Her shock lasted for about ten seconds before laughter and apologies were dealt. Jay was a vision of glum, his face dejected as he squeegeed his extremities off before admitting defeat.

"I'm so sorry," Hailey gasped through breaks, Jay just nodding as he processed the unfortunate event. His once white shirt was brown and a thin layer of grit and mud was all over him. People were walking by shielding their scoffs and laughs, and rightfully so. Jay was a mess and there was no way to rectify it. Before the next wave of traffic rolled by, Hailey pulled Jay away from the curb to a corner and began inventorying things.

"Aw I liked that jacket," she commented.

"You did, I've had this since starting in the unit," Jay commented.

"Well washing it should fix things. There's no way you're going out like this." Jay nodded, turning back towards the apartment without uttering a word. Hailey caught up to him and grabbed an arm, linking up and walking in stride with Jay. So much for the uneventful evening. But then again, when wasn't life like that.

…

A crash coming in the direction of the shower made her jump, dropping the soiled articles of clothing in the washing machine and bolting. Bad images of Jay injured or passed out in the shower danced in her head. She knew things were moving too quickly, that he really wasn't ready for that much activity yet. They'd already had _the_ conversation: that he was brushing off things like it wasn't a big deal. It was one night about a week after he came home. The team had just left his place and he was propped up on the couch, staring into nothing while giving off the vibe that things weren't alright. Hailey inquired, he eventually confessed to not understanding the hovering and strange, hesitant looks. That it was all an accident and that people were overreacting. She went off, explaining how close he came to dying, that whether he liked it or not things were going to be different for him and everyone else. From that point on Jay accepted the new way of things, that everyone was processing the horrific event. He accepted help and occasionally inquired on their well being. When they arranged this date five days ago, that little questioning voice was speaking, verbalizing doubts if they were ready for this. Correction, if she was ready to jump back in. Jay was moving on with life, but was she returning the gesture. But then reality returned as her hand was hovering over the door handle.

"I'm fine, it wasn't me that fell." She sighed while rubbing the sides of her head, scolding herself for still having flashbacks and immediately going for the bad things. Jay was fine and he seemed to be getting that much sooner than her, or everyone else for that matter.

"Do you want me to pick out clothes," she yelled through the door.

"What?!"

"Clothes!"

"Oh yeah, just pick whatever. Hang it on the handle. I'll be out in a second." The upper hand was finally hers. Now she got to determine what they were doing and put them on an even playing field, outfit wise. She flicked the light switch on and froze, gasping at the size and depth of his closet. She found herself surprised that he had more clothing than her, and she was under the impression she had a lot. She walked a couple of steps, rummaging through piles and hung up articles before landing on grey jeans, a black t-shirt, white Nikes with a green swoosh and a gray varsity jacket. It paired well with her look, both of them looking like different crowds of high schoolers.

She was in the process of cleaning up the kitchen, her final stop in the house tidying task, when he came out of his room with hairbrush and product in hand, sheepishly requesting her assistance again. The crouch came and went, the poking, podding, and instructions were spoken and obeyed and half an hour later both were back where it all began: the front door. Hailey felt like she'd done this door locking thing before, feeling the bolt click against her hand before returning the key to its' owner.

"You look nice," she jokingly commented as they got off the elevator.

"Oh thanks. I can't take the credit. My stylist picked it out." She laughed in that way he loved: the slight throwing of her head back as everything squished into her bright, vivacious smile. They waved to the superintendent for the millionth time that evening, his face now one of perplexed as he waved back. They stood under the awning of the building, both looking to the other for the next step.

"Are you sure you're up for this?"

"Oh gosh, yes. I would tell you otherwise," Jay verbally exasperated. She nodded, not totally believing him but rolling with things anyway.

"So I take it were not going wherever you intended."

"Probably not. I'm sure our reservation has long since been handed off to someone else."

"So out of curiosity, where were you taking us?" He gave her one of those 'really' expressions, tilting his head to the side as his face met at an eyebrow.

"I'm not telling you. I'll just save it for another date."

"Another?"

"Oh, I was under the impression this was like a five date agreement kinda thing." She playfully squinted, shaking her head through a sarcastic smile.

"Let's see how this one goes."

"Really? Getting shot doesn't get you a second date or sympathy votes?"

"I'm a tough date."

"Oh ok," he played along.

"Fine, I have a backup place. Follow me." Jay extend the crook of his arm, Hailey rolling her eyes before accepting. The two of them strolled down the street, now wary of where they stopped to cross. Date night, take two.

…

The ride to Avondale was entertaining to say the least. The train car was packed with tourists and gloomy residences, all jammed in like sardines going to their various places. Even at 8pm, the city was bustling with night life, driving home the fact it was the beginning of a spring weekend. After months of being trapped and nestled in their homes and office buildings, the universe was giving the green light for people to venture out into the new, reinvigorated world. Fresh air was substituted for the stuff pouring out of heaters and central units. Snow and ice coated sidewalks were now clear, clean paths circumnavigating the edges of the city. Sure, they were wet and crowded, but it was nice to not require twenty layers just to go get a gallon of milk or a hamburger. Every year it seemed that would be the year winter never left, but those April showers brought forth hope that things were changing for the better. In the moment things were crazy, but taking a step back you can't help but see things as beautiful. The changing of the guard was a thing to marvel at.

When they boarded the train, rain and street water free, it became a game of musical chairs. The second people left, five more were racing and dodging, vying for that one, single seat in the whole car. Jay's month of disconnect with life caught up to him as they boarded the train. His seat securing skills were ten miles slower than the average guy. Hailey grabbed a seat for herself, scooting into a corner so Jay could occupy the spot with her.

"I'll stand," he announced, grabbing a section of the railing as Hailey disagreed.

"No, there's room. Just sit." He shook his head as the car rolled away from the station, quickly relearning the art of balancing on a moving train. Hailey sighed and rolled her eyes, realizing his stubborn streak would win every time. They wove through the city, admiring it's beauty in this transitional time of year. Occasionally Hailey would smirk or laugh and Jay would inquire, getting the same reply each time: 'nothing.' She was falling in love with him. She still saw him as that dying, pale white thing lying in a hospital bed, but the little moments of the night were aiding in the erasing of that ten day time period. His hiding of the pain and discomfort was movie actor worthy and she wanted to applaud him for his efforts. He was down, and definitely different, but he was doing his best to emerge from the fog and blend back into the world. He'd come so far in such a short amount of time she could cry. But instead she got lost in his person. The blue eyes darting between windows, the slower blinks when a bump came along, and the shifting of his weight to match the twist and turns of the track line. She wanted to stand and hang onto him, have one of those closing scenes in a movie where the two lovers made out in a public place. But the strict instructions of a doctor, and the threat of losing her seat kept her planted. It wasn't how she wanted things to begin but it was better than the predictions forty days ago.

Their stop was announced over the intercom as Jay held out a hand for her to grab. They stood inches apart, each holding on to the other for support as the ride came to a stop. They were the first ones out, darting and weaving through the hurried people. It wasn't till the steps down to the street that thing slowed down, both of them falling back into their normal speed. They walked across the street before heading down Sacramento to their destination. Hailey had only been out here a couple of times so was clueless as to where Jay was taking her. He stopped just shy of the patio, pointing up to the sign with a wide smile.

"You ever been here?" It was Honey Butter Fried Chicken, a restaurant who's sandwich rumored to be as good as Chick-Fil-A, the inventor of the chicken sandwich. Hailey shook her head, mouth now salivating. Jay opened the door for her, only to be disappointed by the sign at the entrance of the ordering line: 'Out of chicken. We're sorry for the inconvenience.' The frustration was all over his face, the dejection dripping off his movements.

"Is this a sign or something," he finally asked to no one. Hailey started smiling, grabbing for his shoulder and crying laughing into it. The night had gone so not according to plan there really wasn't anything else to do. Jay guided her out of the restaurant before joining her laughing session.

"I'm sorry, this is just so unbelievable that it's expected."

"Yeah," Jay replied through his humor. He embraced her in his best attempt of a hug, her arms gently wrapping around his waist. People walked around them before turning their heads, wondering what was happening between them. Hailey didn't care and she was sure Jay didn't either. It was just another event in the story of their friendship turned relationship. Their thing had always been to roll with the punches and they'd come to accept this way of living.

"I have an idea," Hailey spoke up. She took the lead, briskly walking ahead of Jay towards the El. It required another lengthy ride back into the Loop, but the plus was that she got to stare at him again. A win-win scenario.

…

They were at the Riverwalk facing the River Hotel, Trump International to their right and the glow of the Apple Store apple acting as their moon. A bench was secured and their bags of food dished out between them, creating a median. It was quiet in this little nook of the city. The boats, people, building lights, and honking car horns becoming a show for their untraditional first date meal. People were too consumed with their purchases to notice them sitting on Apple property and they took full advantage of it. The late night joggers wove their way along the Riverwalk's border while parents shouted to their kids to slow down, that the edge was going to come up before they knew it. But all of this was background noise to the excitement of finally getting the date under way. Jay was inhaling food, earning a couple disgusted looks from Hailey who was nibbling at her hot dog.

"Did you eat at all today?"

"Yes," Jay obviously replied.

"I'm starving. I haven't walk around that long in awhile," he continued, Hailey nodding upon realizing the truth in that.

"So when do you see the doctor again?"

"Two weeks, but that's just the first visit. Will said it'll probably be another month before I get reinstated. The lingering arrhythmias and slow healing set things back for a couple of weeks."

"Are you ready to come back?" Jay energetically nodded through another bite.

"I was ready when I got released." Hailey scoffed, knowing she walked right into that one. Images of him walking the perimeter of the apartment danced in her head. Him sitting around watching TV forced out a couple of snorts as well.

"But enough about me. What's up with you? What's happening at work."

"I was sworn to keep thing confidential. That if I told you anything you'd show up at work tomorrow morning."

"No I wouldn't." Hailey glared at him.

"I'd show up tomorrow afternoon."

"Yeah, that's more like it," she replied, earning a groan from Jay as she laughed. After a month of talking about test results and medical jargon, it was fun to just be normal; act like typical thirty-something year olds without a care in the world. This was like their unofficial celebration of turning the page on a new chapter. She watched him gather their trash and search for the closest can, quickly come to the conclusion that it was all worth it. Whatever pain and suffering and roadblock that came in their way was worth it. Because had none of those things transpired, odds are very likely they'd not be where they were right now. Furthermore, she could see herself doing this for the rest of time. It all felt so right, each person falling into their role seamlessly. She couldn't imagine a life without him. That if this is how things were till the end of time she'd be more than alright with that. Her daydreaming caught his attention as he sat back down. There was the smallest amount of a grunt from the discomfort sitting caused but he ignored it, placing a hand on her knee to recapture her attention. She snapped her head around, embarrassingly smiling as he smirked.

"This was fun," he concluded.

"Yeah," she trailed off.

"Next time we'll spring for a dine-in meal."

"What's wrong with a _Portillo's_ combo?"

"Nothing, it's just not the typical date night setting." She shrugged her shoulders, mentally replying she preferred that over every other option.

"So I know nothing went to plan but…"

"Yes, we have made it to a second date night" Jay nodded in victory, giving her two thumbs up.

"And for the record, I liked this. It was everything a date isn't supposed to be and it was fun." Something hit the top of her head, another drop landing on his wrist simultaneously. They both looked up only to be poked in the eye.

"You got to be kidding me."

"It wasn't supposed to rain till after midnight," she replied while grabbing cups and her purse. Jay jumped up first to shield her with his jacket. The two of them sprinted off into the night, doing their best to outpace the watery substance falling from the sky.

**I have a confession to make and you must not share this with anyone: I have never been on a date. I've never been asked and I certainly haven't forced someone to take me out. It's just something I've never wanted to do. So I found myself at a bit of a disadvantage with this one but I hope you enjoyed it. The directions have been handed off to you. I'm very excited to see where we're going next. **


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2- And Then What

**I'm beyond thankful for you guys. Thank you, thank you, thank you for the sweet and amazing feedback! The prompts you sent in already have the wheels turning so get ready. I cannot wait for the adventures and Upstead moments that are ahead of us. Let's introduce the second prompt of the trip. **

**_Guest: "Upstead is dating or engaged and spends a night together discussing dream weddings and kids."_**

**This is such a cute and smile inducing prompt and I ever so love it. I don't want to talk anymore, let's just get into it!**

Sure she was awake and coherent but ask her about the drive from the district to her place and she'd not be able to answer a single question. A couple of lights might have been close to red and a few car honks might've sounded out when she took a second too long to move, but she didn't care. They'd just wrapped up a child involved case, which was always the hardest to tackle. But this one took things to a whole other level. I won't give out all the details but it did involved adults sending children all over the city to dangerous holes with sketchy characters. It made her sick to her stomach, that all of this was going on for years right under her nose. While she was out grabbing coffee and wondering what TV show she should watch tonight, young innocent lives were changing forever. Cases like this always drove the evilness of the world home, but this one took it a little farther. The glinting reminder on her left hand screamed that soon her dynamics would change. She wouldn't be an army of one, but a single unit of two. She said yes because she loved him and never wanted to be without him, but now the other shoe was dropping. She shuttered to think if what happened today ever happened to them, their future child or children. Or worse, if Jay wasn't there to intervene and save the day. In all honesty, she wasn't even sure if he wanted kids. It wasn't exactly on her radar till a couple of weeks ago and she never thought to ask.

She nonchalantly parked her car in a spot near her building before releasing herself to the cold blast before finding comfort in her warm apartment. After most days like today she put on the warmest clothing, wrapped herself in a blanket, and watch TV till she fell asleep. But tonight was different: Jay was coming over so the two of them could begin working on the next step, the absolute last thing she wanted to do tonight. It all felt so wrong right now. She stood in her closet for minutes daydreaming in her nightmare, refusing and unable to shake those terrible images and thoughts out of her head.

"What would you do," Hailey thought out loud, slowly shaking her head before doing her thing. She scrolled through the channels and she was clearly out of it, her eventual selection evidence of that: the Home Shopping Network. They were selling cutlery and leftover containers, but Hailey wasn't paying attention, now transitioning from daydreaming to crying. She finally found solace in her grumbling stomach, relieved something else could take her mind off of things. Her head was deep in the shelves when the chime of her opening front door sounded. He was there, her highlight of the day.

"Hailey," he surprised and somewhat nervously inquired? She wasn't in the living room but her keys were in the bowl. She was here but not really.

"Kitchen," she yelled, his footsteps inching closer to her location. Upon reaching the doorway to the kitchen Jay let out a small laugh. Hailey was buried deep in the fridge, the plethora of containers, smelly take out, and vegetables strewn all over the place evidence of that. It was what she did when stress came calling: she cleaned. She did it at his place far too many times, and she'd tackled her bedroom, bathroom, living room and now kitchen all while the two of them had been together. Jay had this running joke that she was the opposite of the 'Before She Cheats' woman. Instead of walking out to a vehicle with keyed sides, her name carved in the seats, and Louisville sluggard headlights, the guy came home to a clean and organized place and knew he'd done something wrong. Both a hilarious and chilling image and Jay always poked fun at her with it. So before the two of them spent the night scarping food out of the corners of her freezer, Jay got down on the floor with her, reaching in and grabbing her hands before making her connect to his gaze.

"Hey," he spoke with a smiley voice, making her want to smack him. She didn't get how he could be so happy after today. She broke the gaze quicker than he wanted, driving home that she was in that mood.

"I just need to finish this," was all he got back. Her hands slipped out of his before scrambling back to whatever she was doing. Jay rose to his feet and grabbed for the bag of food he'd purchased. He intentionally plopped it loud against the door ledge of the fridge. He bent over to rest his chin on top of his closed fist and waited for her to notice. It took her about a minute to pick up on the adorable sight just to her left. When she did a glimpse of human returned to her.

"Is that Antique Taco?"

"Yes," he replied through a clenched jaw, smirking and cocking his head towards the bag before standing back up. He always knew what she needed even when she wasn't totally aware of it. The crap was thrown back in the fridge before leaping at and embracing him. She loved him, plain and simple. He was that light beam that shines through the cracks of clouds on a super dreary day. Whatever dread was coursing through her veins vanished when he walked through the door. They were opposites that somehow found a way to attract each other. And as she transitioned from a hug to longingly and deeply kissing him, she concluded this is why she said yes; they were what the other wasn't and they truly completed each other. And yes, Hailey totally knew how cheesy that was.

"You ok," Jay asked while catching his breath, Hailey nodded before venturing down the side of his face to his neck. Jay seemed to get the cue. They began standing in the middle of the room before the dance shifted to a counter, her on it while Jay rested against it. From there it was him holding her before the two of them ended on the floor. I think the previous generation called this afternoon delight. The growl of Hailey' stomach brought the dance to a halt, Jay laughing as Hailey clutched her stomach and giggled. They both laid there for a couple of minutes, catching their breaths while communicating via eyesight. Everything was right in her world again.

"Let's eat," Jay announced after a couple of minutes. With his assistance, Hailey was on her feet and darting for the bag. She grabbed her loot and ran for the couch, not waiting for Jay to join her. Fish and sweet and spicy chicken tacos from _Antique Taco_ are a Godsend and cannot be delayed. Jay rolled his eyes and smirked watching her devour the stuff. She was a messy eater when it came to tacos, but he loved her nonetheless. He took a seat at one corner of the couch while Hailey was on the other, providing both of them enough space to dine. The TV was still playing the Home Shopping Network, the broadcast having now moved to cardigans and older lady shoes.

"Interested," Jay jokingly asked?

"What…oh, it was on when I turned the TV on. Were you watching it last night?" Jay rolled his eyes before reaching for the remote, the screen switching over to blackness momentarily. That awkward silence filled the apartment in an instant. Hailey's somber mood was obviously all around the place. Despite her best efforts and their session in the kitchen, something was off and everything was pointing to her. Jay picked up on it the moment he opened the front door and was waiting to ask her about it. Soon the days of keeping things inward wouldn't work. They both had to improve on their speaking and confession skills. He waited till she had finished eating before poking and prodding.

"So what's up?" Hailey chugged a sip of beer as her eyes went wide.

"What? Nothing. Why do you ask."

"Because the kitchen cleaning and the TV and you're not looking at me says something is wrong." Hailey adjusted further into the couch, rubbing her eyes before coming to a point on her nose before speaking. There was no getting things past him.

"Today was hard." Jay placed his bottle on the coffee table before completely relaxing, placing a hand under his head and titling it as she spoke.

"I mean, any case involving kids is hard. But today was on a whole other level. This.." She held her left hand up, allowing Jay to gaze at his big, shiny purchase.

"Has me thinking down the road. What if that was our child in all of that. What would we do? I don't even think I'd be able to make it through something like that. I don't know. We just have never even talked about that." The whole time she spoke Jay never lost his focus on her. He didn't react in a positive or negative way nor did he get defensive. The floor was hers and he wanted her to get everything out. There were tears in her eyes now, just beginning to trickle down her face. She was silent for a moment, allowing Jay to state his side of things.

"I'm sorry you had a bad day." She nodded, accepting his extended hand.

"And yeah, today was tough and that's because we both sympathize with people, sometimes too much. It's natural to have doubts, to wonder if put in the same situation how we would react. We're all human. But I don't think we're put in events or spots that we cannot handle. So it would be hard, incredibly hard, but we'd get through it and come out the other side stronger, just like those kids we met today. Let's not forget we saved thirty kids. Thirty lives get to live free and however they want." The two of them sat in silence for a moment, enjoying the peace and freedom of their time. Talking was always tough, but that weightless feeling afterwards was worth it.

"Why can't you stay every night," Hailey asked through wiping her eyes.

"Because we both can't get out of our leases." Hailey chuckled while nodding, not forgetting that annoying little fact.

"So, do you want kids?"

"Yeah," Jay replied, not totally convincing Hailey.

"I mean, not tomorrow but sometime down the road." Jay trailed off, shaking his head after a moment.

"Hey, you won't be like him."

"I hope not. How many do you want to have?"

"Two, a boy and a girl."

"In which order."

"Girl first then the boy. He's gotta be humbled by having an older sister." Jay laughed as he nodded.

"As long as our kids don't end up like Will I'll be thrilled. Kid has been nervous and on edge since he was a toddler." Hailey threw her head back in laughter, the two of them humored over the realness of that truth. This was fun, getting to dream. In their line of work dreams are few and far between. They were there when things went wrong, when hopes and aspirations died or were forever impacted. It wasn't the life for everyone, but one they took on wholeheartedly.

"Who would be the one to stay home when we have kids? Let's face it, we both can't work in Intelligence when that happens."

"I think we're going a little too far down the trail now. We'll deal with that question when we come to it," Jay replied. Hailey inched closer to Jay who pulled her into a hug. She was laying on top him, her head resting on his chest. Jay kissed the top of her head twice before hugging her a little tighter. The deep, agape love was mutual. There wasn't a scenario where they weren't doing this for the rest of time.

"In other news, what are we doing about our wedding?" Hailey moaned, not ready for the mayhem of wedding planning. It was the true test of a couple, deciding invitation fonts and what silverware explained their love for each other. When truly getting to the heart of things, she dreaded what was about to happen.

"Can't we just ran away to Vegas and get hitched?" Jay giggled.

"No. We're not rebellious teenagers." Hailey lightly and lovingly smacked his stomach before speaking.

"Who says we aren't?" Jay shrugged.

"I just hate weddings," Hailey blurted out, immediately looking up to Jay, waiting for him to say otherwise. Instead he sat up further, encouraging Hailey to do the same.

"Ditto." She responded with a kiss, a long and affectionate one.

"I love you."

"Love you too. What's up with you," he laughed.

"I was dreading wedding plans." Jay stood and gathered their trash and empty bottles, thinking as he headed towards the kitchen.

"What about getting married at the courthouse and then having a dinner with everyone? We may not like the idea of a wedding but a lot of people are going to want to celebrate with us." Hailey thought about it for a minute, liking his idea more and more.

"What if we just get married and then spring a dinner date on people and then announce we're already married?" Jay stuck his head through the doorway, giving her that smile she ever so loved.

"I don't think I could hold that in for that long."

"Well, we have time to figure it out." Jay nodded before returning to the couch.

"Wanna get to bed?" She thought he'd never ask. Hailey stood before the two of them resumed kissing and connecting with each other. Jay picked her up and walked, the two of them not bothering to close the door or care what the neighbors heard.

**This one was short but so much fun to write and I hope you guys enjoyed it. Can't wait to see where we're going next. Thank you for reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3- Time for Reckoning

**Greetings one and all! Thank you so, so much for your very sweet comments. They truly make my day! You guys are killing it with sending in prompts. I'm going to try my best to get to them all. So this chapter's prompt comes from a very great writer and person!**

**_CPDSVU: "…An idea of what season 7 could open with? Like Upstead just reacting on their feelings (instead of the slow burn that we'll probably get from the show?)" _**

**So first, I love this idea. I know a couple other people have written on this topic and done a great job so I'm going to do my best to not step on any toes. Second, I have my theories and opinions on what's going to happen in the season opener but I'm going to try and not let that influence this. This isn't about me, but you the reader and what you requested. So without any further comments, let's get this started!**

The twists and turns of life are ever mysterious and never ending. Just when defeat was all but certain, life in the form of death took them on a ride. They were down to the bare bones, three of the seven present and accounted for. Jay was the interim leader so he got the called first, reports of a break-in at a residence in the Lincoln Park area. The address was known, but certainly not one you'd expected to be called to, especially knowing who the owner of the place was. Given the day he'd had, retaliation or pushback was to be expected, but nothing of this caliber. It was late, the wind was lazily blowing around as they pulled up to the location. The numerous cars, police officers, media personnel, and crime scene investigators let them all know this wasn't about broken glass and stolen valuables. Those sixth senses they lived for told them they'd only learned of the tip of the iceberg. Kim looked to Kevin who looked to Jay, all of them not completely grasping the enormity of what was on the other side of the doors. They took the stairs two at a time, coming to a dead stop when they saw him, the enemy of their future lying dead in his foyer.

He was shot, multiple times. The door showed no signs of prying nor was there hint of a struggle. It was as if Kelton opened the front door for his killer, the time between greeting the visitor and his maker probably a hand full of seconds. No one said anything, shocked and amazed at how quickly things changed. Hours ago Kelton was delivering his victory speech and hours away from dismantling Intelligence. But now, standing over his very still body, the future was completely unknown in every possible way.

"Now what," Kim numbly asked, glancing over at Jay who shook his head. Kevin walked off, saying he needed to do something but no one really heard him. Jay walked closer to the body, examining the wounds and manner in which Kelton was laying. It was personal, it was off guard, it was going to take everything to prove it wasn't the obvious suspect. In most cases, people were innocent until proven guilty. But tonight, Voight looked to be guilty and they had to give him everything they had to prove he wasn't. It was all insane, like this night had to be a movie script. Things don't work out this way, problems don't often vanish in this manner. They stayed at the house for several hours, canvassing neighbors, listening to forensics reports, and observing everything. All signs pointed to an attack, a very personal and deliberate one at that. Whoever did this had every intention of Kelton not waking up in the morning. It was hard to not see Voight's hand in all of it.

Dawn was beginning to break over the horizon when things died down. The yellow tape remained, but everyone and everything else trickled out. Intelligence stayed till the body was transported to the coroner's office and on the table. She vowed to be quick, possibly having answers by nightfall. They stood outside the office exhausted, still in disbelief over things.

"We should try and sleep for a bit," Jay suggested to the group. It was weird being in charge. He was now the tone setter, the source they'd all turn to for answers. He loved it, hated it, pretty much feared it for the moment. Unlike Voight, Jay wasn't one to force people to push their nose to the grindstone, go all out on zero sleep and sustenance. There was just so much one could do on an empty tank. Evidence was being inspected, a body was about to be dug into, there wasn't much for them to do for a few hours. Brainstorming immediately came to mind, but it was pointless when none of them could think straight. Kim and Kevin didn't balk or ignore his instructions, just nodded and in zombie-like fashion went their separate ways. Jay climbed into the truck and drove, putting himself on auto pilot in an effort to not completely panic.

His mind drifted to her. They'd all but spilled their darkest secrets and affections, him more than her. They couldn't end this the way they were, not with the untapped potential lying at their feet. He'd miss her, he missed her tonight. Her lack of presence at the scene worried him. She was informed of the call, instructed to head over, but never did. He didn't suspect her, of course, but it was unsettling, worrisome that something might've happened. In this whirlwind time anything was possible.

"You're crazy and tired," he told himself as he pulled up to his building. Parking was readily available this time of day, so it took one loop of the building before finding the ideal spot. He trudged, yawned, tip toped through the front entrance before climbing into the elevator. People were leaving their apartments as he was coming in, which was an odd phenomena. His neighbors appeared to be a day ahead of him, starting their Friday while he was still living out his Thursday. He waved with dreary, half open eyes, getting looks and delayed acknowledgments. His progress was brought to a halt when he rounded the corner, the very person on his mind resting against his front door.

"Hey," he quizzically spoke, hesitating a couple steps away from her. She was resting her back on his door, legs straight out as her hands came together in her lap. She was daydreaming, face a vision of blank. His voice moved her to blink, eventually glancing in his direction. Hailey's eyes were glazed over, the lack of sleep putting her in a great stupor. Her eyebrows perked up seeming to be doing the talking.

"How long have you been here," Jay inquired, doing his best to unlock the door without stepping on Hailey.

"Couple minutes," she mumbled. Jay shook his head, the level of stiffness and slow blinks calculated her immobility to many hours. He budged the door, offering a hand for her to grasp and she accepted. She wobbled through the dizziness, landing on a stool at his kitchen counter. They didn't speak for several minutes, Jay scrounging for food while Hailey motivated herself to stay awake. The quietness was calming, the perfect remedy for the day they'd all just lived through. They'd been targeted, shot at, lost colleagues and soon jobs before showing up at their enemy's doorstep to find him dead; and that was all before the stroke of midnight. So to hear nothing, to look around at stillness and normal things was almost euphoric. Questions pertaining to the next step danced in both their heads, each mentally concluding rest and time would work those out.

"I went to see Adam." Jay turned around, OJ in hand as he reached for a glass. Hailey detected the smallest amount of snide, watching him nod as he went to the sink.

"Even if we ended things, I still care about him. He's a friend, colleague, I wanted to check on him."

"You don't have to explain yourself."

"Well I feel like I do. I ignored you for him and I wanted to give my side of the story." Jay nodded, downing a large gulp as she continued.

"So, how was it? Any suspects yet?"

"I don't want to talk about it right now. It's really.."

"Crazy?"

"Tiring." She smirked, twiddling her fingers as her head lowered onto the counter. Sleep was really winning this time. Jay asked her about a breakfast, stopping himself as a snore slipped out from her lips. She was bent over, head completely on the counter as the rest of her was slumped in the chair, nearing the point of falling off. Jay collected her in his arms and brought her down the hall, gently placing her on a side of his bed. She never stirred during the journey, nestling rather quickly and easily against his pillows. This act of kindness wasn't looking for that kind of moment. It was a gesture of friendship, meeting a need. Jay observed her for about six seconds before melatonin's largest wave swept over his body. Without a second thought Jay face planted on the other side of his bed. Both of them were totally out, clothing and shoes still on.

…

An extra loud siren woke her up first. She blinked, cloudy eyes revealing a room she didn't fall asleep in. Her mind began working, trying to figure out how she got from the barstool to bed without realizing it. Furthermore, how she ended up in his bed was startling to say the least. This wasn't how she wanted this visit to go, never her endgame. But the soft snores to her left told her the rest of the tale, they both passed out like Sleeping Beauty. She adjusted in the bed in an effort to take him in. He was on his stomach, face turned away from her. The deep heaves of breathing made his entire back rise and fall. His shoed foot would twitch, brush kicking the end of the bed. But he didn't look peaceful, the stress rippling off his body. Muscles were tense, his body was relatively stiff. Hailey wondered if she nudged him would Jay strongly react. She rolled away from him, wanting to get up and examine how drained she appeared. It was a single, slow roll off the bed but she was on her feet without Jay waking up. Tip toeing across the room and towards the bathroom door, Hailey made it to the room and turned the light on, which was the fatal mistake. It was daylight out but the changing of the light jolted him awake. In seconds Jay was awake, sitting up, and examining his phone. While they may have rested, the rest of the case wasn't.

"What time is it," Hailey cooly asked, doing her best to brush off that the technically just slept together.

"Noon," Jay replied through a yawn.

"So that was what, four hours?"

"Something like that." Hailey's hair was a royal mess, hair barely hanging on to the hair tie around its' girth. The bags and puffiness of very little sleep stood out like a sore thumb. She sighed, praying for an escape route from all this. This wasn't the life she planned out in her mind. Her intentions were to never be this involved with colleagues nor did she ever envision sitting court side to the demise of Intelligence. But for the moment it's what she had, it was her life story and she had to make the best of it. She brushed her hair with her hands, balling it all into a messy bun and heading back for the bedroom. Jay was standing in the closet, throwing on a new shirt as he pushed his boots off. Hailey darted out and headed for the living room, she felt to be a massive invader of privacy.

His apartment was a mess and the organizer in her came out. It wasn't uncommon for him to get messy, especially after the few weeks they endured. She hoped he didn't mind her motherly action, like she was cleaning up his door room on parent weekend. The tidying up began in the living room, straightening out pillows and TV remotes before heading to the hallway. Shoes were cast in random fashion, as if they were launched upon Jay's entrance. She was in the kitchen, loading dishes while humming something random when he returned, taken aback with humor.

"You didn't have to do that."

"Sorry, habit." She shut the water off to face him, the two of them meeting at the kitchen counter. Looking back, this pause in their day was the start of it all. It wasn't grand or something worth remembering, but it was the point in time where they finally reached enough. No more mixed signals, gone was the tension. It was them, in his kitchen, both nervously smirking at each other.

"So…"

"Yeah…" Jay split away first, slowing walking towards the couch before turning back, throwing a shoulder in his direction. He planted in a corner while Hailey took a chair, resuming their awkward silence and million meaning looks.

"How was Adam?" Hailey looked down as she spoke.

"Fine, I guess. We only saw him for a couple of seconds and that was after Platt made a deal with someone. He wasn't too thrilled to see us, but it was okay."

"This is all nuts." Hailey nodded.

"Did you know?"

"No, did you?" She shook her head.

"How did things end up like this?" Jay thought for a moment, stealing a glance at his lit phone before replying.

"Like you said, a day of reckoning was coming. We all make wrong choices and sometimes the consequences come back to haunt us." More true words had never been spoken. Quite frankly Jay was tired. Tired of the dancing around and coded messages. For once in his life he wanted things straight, good or bad he wanted to know everything. It was the only way out of this most recent mess.

"But how stupid of him. He had to know things were going to end this way, why throw away a perfectly good, promising career. And for what? Approval from Voight? Reconciliation for all the grief he gave Antonio? It was stupid! And why didn't he come to us for help!" Hailey smacked the arm of the chair, rising to pace up and down Jay's living room rug. Jay loved it, watching her emotions bubble over. She was pretty reserved at work, her mood almost always a step below everyone else. It's not that she was detached but she liked to keep her secrets, do enough to bond with the team and victims, but Jay always felt she was holding something back. So this outburst from her made him chuckle. It let him she was just like everyone else.

"I don't know. I have no clue what happens next, or where we go from here."

"And you're the one in charge?"

"Yeah. But can we forget all the other crap for a minute and talk about this," Jay motioned between the two of them while he spoke. Hailey knew this was coming, it was the large cloud hanging over them since she showed up to his doorstep. Looking back, she wasn't sure what made her do it. Perhaps her subconscious pushed her, made her do something out of character for a change. She ignored the feelings for so long, blamed other people and past issues for the roadblocks. But now she was standing in his apartment of her own doing, still refusing to blurt out what both of them knew to be true. The writing had been on the wall for so long the ink was beginning to fade. The real question was if she truly meant her thoughts and actions.

"Can we drop the mixed signals and weird dance? I'm tired of existing in neutral." She inhaled, bit the side of her mouth, and sat down while exhaling.

"Okay." Jay sat up just a tad, one leg crossed while the other hung off the couch.

"I care about you, Hailey. A lot. I can't do all of this without you there in some way. Remember when I told you work place romances aren't a good idea?" She nodded while rubbing a temple.

"Well, I kinda lied. To both of us. At the time I was trying to convince myself that I wasn't feeling what I felt and didn't really want to do I was thinking. But through everything we've been through this year, you're the one thing that's always been there. You've been the bright spot in my day. I'm not promising eternity right now, but I would like to make this something bigger." There was a pause, Jay throwing the ball to her and hoping she'd volley back. She coked her head, a very small smile creeping from the corners of her mouth.

"Why do you think I broke things off with Adam?" Jay's eyes went wide, mouth meeting at a corner of his face.

"Because he got in the way of your work."

"What Adam and I had was fun, but you and I are much deeper than that…and we haven't done anything yet."

"Well what do you think all that was," Jay answered while pointing behind him towards his room.

"Oh my word that doesn't count.."

"-Well technically…"

"No. Jay Halstead" she replied while smacking him, her face that of shock. His laughter and her loving harm was the antidote for everything. While they were still battling in the trenches, this was the first time both of them could look up; realize there is hope in the midst of chaos. Then something very out of character for both of them happened next. Jay was looking down at his phone, beginning to answer questions regarding his whereabouts, when Hailey launched for him. He didn't have time to react, dropping his phone on the floor as Hailey's lips met his. It was a release of emotions, the angst and hesitation rescaping from both of them as they collapsed onto the couch before rolling onto the floor.

"This is just a reaction to the stress of the day."

"Totally," Jay replied before they connected again. It was good, it was freeing, this was a moment, a thing they both needed. Similar to when you go several years between a beach trip. When the sand finally touches your feet you realize how much you missed it. Like it's something that's always been there that you ignored for so long. So when you finally react on the impulse, do the one thing your heart and soul have been dying for, life feels worth it again. Furthermore, you wonder why it took you so long to finally do it.

Jay's buzzing phone brought things to a sudden stop, Hailey moaning in annoyance as Jay reached for the device. Work was forever and always going to be the hurdle in their way. But for the first time since entering Intelligence, Hailey hated it.

"Yeah," Jay answered, doing his best to hide the happiness and catching of his breath.

"Where are you? Platt's asking for you. We have a potential suspect" Atwater said.

"Tell her I'm on my way and I'll pick up Hailey. Have you heard from her?"

"No, called and texted couple times but she hasn't responded."

"Ok, I'll stop by her place, be there in twenty." He waited till the phone call was definitely over before getting up, speed walking to the hallway to grab a pair of shoes.

"So slick," Hailey joked. Jay shrugged, waving for Hailey to hurry up. A weight felt to be off their shoulders. Gone were the days and moments of uncertainty and dodging the obvious. All that stood in front of them were unblemished days. She stood out in the hallway as Jay locked the door, his gait extra fast in an effort to make up the time. His first day as interim leader wasn't going how he'd imagined, but then again nothing went as planned in their line of work. They made it to the elevator, rode in silence before heading to the street. Jay rounded the driver's side of the truck, stopping while his hand was on the handle.

"What?" Hailey was silent and somber, very detached from her mood a few seconds ago.

"Are you sure about this? Do we really want to mess up what's worked for us? Especially now in the middle of all of this?"

"Hailey, the only thing I'm confident about is this. I couldn't have gotten to where I am without you. I don't know what is going to happen in the coming days, but I know I want you there with me. We'll always be partners, we'll always have each other's back. The logistics will be figured out when they come along." She loved that, nodding in total agreement as she climbed in. They drove off into the unknown, fully embracing that one couldn't function without the other.

"We should have a name."

"Huh?!"

"A hybrid name, like a celebrity couple." She thought for a bit, the name popping into her mental viewfinder as they pulled into the district."

"Upstead." Jay laughed, rolling his eyes in her goofiness.

**They started filming today and I'm celebrating. The hiatus is over! I hope you guys enjoyed this one. With all the unknowns surrounding pretty much everyone it's hard to plan a story. Also, it's my goal to stay away from cheese as much as possible and I hope I succeeded. Thank you so much for reading! **


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4- Part Of Me

**Greetings, guys! How is everyone doing?! We're jumping right into things this chapter. Here's the prompt for what's ahead. **

**_Guest: "I'd love to read about Jay opening up more about his time in the Army to Hailey and her helping him with his PTSD." _**

**When I first read this I was almost immediately brought to the episode 'Trigger.' At the end of the episode Jay talks about how a lot of bad stuff happened and how that time of his life is just apart of him, not all of him. Of course, I'm sitting there yelling at my television asking/begging for him to spill. I'm still sitting here waiting for some trace amount of storyline from that period of his life. So while we wait, I think we shall use that discussion with Hailey to springboard this chapter. This will take place immediately after that episode, the two of them back at Jay's place talking. Are you guys ready? Let's dive in. **

The Mayo Clinic defines post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD, as a mental health condition that's triggered by a terrifying event, either experiencing or witnessing it. For a good amount of people, terrifying events only effect them for a short period of time. They react, absorb, and then find a way to cope with the event. Sadly, this is not the case for everyone. PTSD can be debilitating, causing real harm to one's normal way of life. From a negative outlook on life to a shifting of physical or emotional reactions, PTSD can and often does drastically alter the way people live their lives.

The biggest hurdle in overcoming, or living with PTSD is avoiding or limiting triggers. Triggers can be anything or everything. From a voice to a word to an entire area of the world, a split second entity or person or sound can flip a switch, bring people right back to that terrifying moment in their life. Some people are better able to manage them, while others live their life a shell of their former self, crippled by an event in their past. Therapy and medication are vital to conquering this giant. Talking puts things into perspective, allows the thoughts and images to leave one's mind and exhale them into the world, allowing other people to help carry the burden before eventually burying it. One day, PTSD can and will become a part of someone's life, not their entire identity.

Jay knew all of this, had done the therapy and drugs a long time ago. He knew his triggers and grew to know those awful, stressful days of his past were just that, a previous chapter of his life. He had his low moments but always strived to seek the positive, find that silver lining in the dark skies. But cases like today's, the ones that literally involved the scenes of his past, brought everything back. It was a test of grand proportions that somewhat caught him off guard. He was thankful for the support, the procedures he gained to cope with things, but found himself still struggling. As he rested against that Suburban, watching the lives of free, innocent people joyfully step into safety he couldn't help but feel guilt. Guilty for assuming the worst, chalking those he helped free as equals to those evil forces on the other side of the world from so long ago. This group of people was just like him, striving to turn dreams into reality in the land of opportunity. He was ashamed, angry, wanting to be alone to wallow and lash out over his biased past; kick himself for letting that outlier influence everything. Hailey did her best to sway him back towards reality, remind him of the good he did on their behalf. Jay was grateful for her; appreciative for her continuous shove and never ending compassion. She offered to drive him home and he eventually, kinda reluctantly agreed. They were a couple of steps away from the truck, Jay's hand hovering over the handle when Voight called her back, a large stack of paperwork standing between her and beer o' clock.

"Go," Jay emotionlessly told her. She gave him that look, letting Jay know she wasn't buying what he was selling.

"I'll be fine. I'll see you later." She stood there for a couple more seconds, finally stepping away as he perked his forehead up and forced out the fakest smile.

"I won't be long," she reassured. Jay nodded, rounding the to the driver's side and climbing in. She stepped away, sighing in the unfortunate unfolding of events that is procedural paperwork. As she watched him drive away, she couldn't help but feel she just allowed a terrible mistake.

The immersion began about two blocks away from the scene. Gunfire could be heard in the distance, causing Jay to swivel his head around. The truck would come to an immediate stop, cars honking and moving around as Jay peered out of every window, radio in hand for when he spotted the shooter. When a crowd never charged toward the vehicle, no was there any other commotion, he resumed driving. From there things spiraled to tying people to memories. A child would flashback to one he interacted with; a man would match with a fellow soldier. It was very similar to how people described a manic state. You're living in one world but existing in another. Smells, sounds, distant echos of scenes from war danced in his head, creating this friendly nightmare in his head. The standing still at a green light was the final straw, Jay realizing he'd reached a point of being out of control. He wasn't functioning normally, fully under the power of the illusion. He shook his head, pulling over to the side as angry drivers glared him down, completely ticked he had the nerve to hold up their evening plans. Life went into autopilot. Jay turned the ignition off, got out, locked the doors and began walking, destination unknown. This was his life for the next couple of hours, walking with zero emotion with no endpoint in sight, fully re-living a chaotic part of his past.

…

"Jay? It's me." Hailey had been pounding on his door for at least a minute now, getting zero hint that Jay was home. Upon arriving at Jay's place his car was not there, neighbors and landlord not sure if they'd seen him come home. At the time she didn't have a key, so her only option was to keep banging. When another couple minutes of that failed she reached for her phone, blowing up his phone with calls and texts, none of them coming back that he acknowledged. Fear crept into the back of her mind, dark conclusions seeming to be the only reason for this odd situation. She dropped the food and beverages and swiftly walked, contemplating if she should call in the calvary for assistance.

"Hey this is Jay, leave me a message and I'll get back to you soon."

"Dammit, Jay," Hailey cursed as she threw her phone on the passenger seat. She shut the door, pressed her forehead to the steering wheel and breathed, closing her eyes in an effort to collect herself.

"He wouldn't do something that drastic," she overly reminded herself. She went back to the case, realizing she only knew snippets of his military experience, kicking herself for wanting to help without fully knowing anything. She shook her head after a time, reminding herself she can only go forward from this point.

"Adam, I need you to do something for me and this has to stay between us," she calmly begged as she pulled away from the apartment.

…

It was pitch black by the time she pulled put to the location. The truck was parked a couple miles away, but the phone was on his person. The location of the car told her he was on his way home, something forcing him to stop and leave. She didn't know if it was criminal or personal, but whatever it was was grand enough to make him walk a couple of miles to Maggie Daley Park. She ran through Millennium Park and over the walk bridge that connected the two green spaces, eyes laser focus and mouth hesitantly calling his name. Joggers looked at her funny while families on their evening strolled pulled in close, shielding themselves from the threat of something. Her gait slowed at the playground, noticing the large, slumped figure on a bench not moving. While she couldn't completely make out facial features, she knew it was him. It was sitting up and alive looking, a promising start.

"Hey you," she calming panted, knowing she wasn't going to get a response. Will had told her tales of being slapped when Jay was in an episode. The time Jay actually, yet unknowingly drew his gun on her solidified the tales. Those were dark times, Hailey grateful they appeared to be dwindling. Instead of touching him she had to create a voice, a sound that would pull him out. She waved her hands, receiving steady blinks and glazed over eyes.

"It's pretty dark out here, why don't we head back towards your place?" Again, nothing from Jay. She inched closer to the bench, taking a seat on the opposite end. She so wanted to reach over, brush his shoulder and shake him out of the nightmare.

"Jay, none of what you're seeing right now is live. It's a dream, something that already happened. You're safe and past it. Can you look at me?" She inched closer as she noticed a hand twitch.

"Jay, just talk. I'm not leaving you alone." His head snapped up, like it was plugging back in with the world. He gasped, looking around in an effort to grasp his surroundings. He was shaking, emotions suddenly and overwhelming flooding in. Hailey inched close enough to tap his shoulder and he flinched, arm raised in a striking stance.

"Hey, it's just me." Tears were in the corners of his eyes as he relaxed, obviously distraught and scared for himself.

"Did I.."

"No, I'm fine. Everything's fine. I promise nothing happened." His body kept reconnecting, shoulders and torso rocking back against the bench, creating a curve against the straight surface. The wind was picking up, forcing a slight stiffness into the October air, letting the city know the gates of winter were about to burst open. Guards and night owls were slowing their gate at the park, Hailey waving and reassuring them before they sped off. She had to admit, it was odd seeing adults at a playground, but in the moment she didn't care. Jay didn't speak for awhile, just looked out in front of him. He had no memory of reaching this point and it worried him, blackouts were supposed to be a thing of his past. Last time things got this bad were when she left, his rock that swept away without saying goodbye. That episode was a long one and it nearly took his job. While it was unsettling that his old ways quickly and easily reappeared, he took comfort in that this evening's escapade didn't rank in the top five.

"Let's get out of here," he mumbled. Jay rose and walked, swaying a couple of steps before finding his footing. The rest of the night Hailey became a human guardrail, standing behind him and verbally warning him of going the wrong way. She guided him to her car and practically pushed him into the passenger seat, his puppy dog eyes watching her round the car and get situated in the driver's seat.

"This is embarrassing," he confessed as they pulled away.

"It's fine. Happens to everyone."

"Not really," he joked as they drove into the night. It was a silent ride to his place, not even driving pet peeves interrupting the silence. Hailey wasn't sure if she was supposed to say something and Jay wasn't giving off vibes that he wanted to talk. The last thing she wanted to do was guide this thing, force Jay to walk into a world he didn't want to. The night was in his court, she had no other option other than to wait for him to serve something that she could volley. He followed her into his building as the two rode in silence in the elevator. They didn't look at each other as they walked down the hall, but the items sprawled outside of his door changed things.

"What is that?"

"Coke and Slim Jims. It's an old trick of mine. Best way to get over tough days."

"What happened to beers?" She vigorously shook her head.

"No way. We're already too wound up for that."

"Yeah, probably," he joked, helping her gather the loot as he opened the door. The light revealed a pristine place, evidence that tonight's episode was a brief one. In times past a wrecked apartment meant he was spiraling, so to see things in order drove home that for the most part, Jay's life was on the up and up. She set the food and drinks on the counter as Jay worked his way to the bedroom, the sound of shoes thrown against a wall letting Hailey know Jay was changing in the closet. Curiosity got the best of her. It was so not her thing, but the temptation was too powerful. She tipped toed down the hall, mentally smacking herself for getting this nosy. Jay was fine, not in need of a babysitter. Plus, there's be no excuse for her ear being pressed to his door when he eventually found her. In a way, she wasn't trusting him, but she kept venturing. She listened to the closet door close and the bathroom door open, water running down the drain as glass and spitting fell in line with the brushing of teeth. He cleared his throat too close to the door, a burst of nervous energy propelling her down the hall.

"You need something," Jay inquired, watching her face turn read as she turn towards him.

"Just…wanted to know if you wanted Coke or Dr. Pepper." He smirked widely, rolling his eyes as the two of them didn't believe her excuse.

"Coke," he replied, choosing to ignore things. He certainly wasn't qualified to analyze people's activities tonight. He returned to the kitchen and gathered the beef jerky and glass of Coke, ushering for Hailey to sit in the living room with him.

"I feel like I'm in high school," he joked as Hailey got situated in an adjacent chair, smacking him out of humor.

"Stop, don't knock it till you try it." They downed one box, and kept going till they'd cleared three boxes. It was an unofficial race to see who could open packages faster. There's always one beef stick that refuses to open and Hailey felt like she got every single one. Jay would laugh at her in victory as she struggled epically. A loud burp bubbled out of her mouth, the Coke, beef stick combo brought things to a halt. Both of them cried tears of hilariousness at her very uncharacteristic moment. Jay was the first to bring things down, settling into the couch as he rubbed his eyes in frustration. Whether either of them was ready it was time to get to the heart of the day; the elephant had to finally be taken down piece by piece.

"It was the kids that always made it hard. Just to see them living in that environment and happy was tough. They were content living in basically a war zone. They couldn't go play, couldn't run around and just be. Watching people die was tough, and the fire fights weren't ever something I feared, but watching the innocent people forced to live like that was trying."

"Jay, we don't have to.."

"No, it's fine. I don't want to keep this inside forever." Hailey transitioned from chair to couch, settling in as Jay continued. His introduction was so blunt, but then again that what the topic warranted. There wasn't a poetic way to talk about this kind of thing.

"My first tour we were on protection detail, going through towns after they'd been attacked and watching out for repercussions or fallout. In one village we were in the middle of this huge square, all the houses and businesses seemed to dead end to that location. There was a group of kids playing soccer and I wanted to join in, kinda get to know them and help them realize we were there to protect them, not harm. I got within a couple of feet when the commander yelled at me, saying it was too dangerous. That struck a chord. You never think of kids as being dangerous or threats, but in that area that's what the Taliban was using. So from that point on I always had to keep my distance. We'd wave and smile at them but were never allowed to talk to them, get close to them." Hailey nodded, sniffing away tears. She knew this was tough for him to talk about, and he was probably nervous to verbalize his thoughts. Talking wasn't going to come from her, this was all about him tonight.

"Couple weeks later after we moved on, we got word ten kids were abducted in the middle of the night, turning up in another village as…"

"I'm sorry, Jay."

"Yeah, I was out of it for a couple of days. Just totally lost it. Mouse was the one that finally got me to a point of functioning with it." Jay looked over to Hailey who was a little clueless as to who this 'Mouse' was.

"He's another story for another day. It's a long, complicated one." She smirked, excited that Jay wanted to keep this going.

"So the kid in the basement today…" Jay nodded.

"Brought it all back. It's hard to not go there. Such an awful, stark realization at one point in time. Sometimes it's hard to live with that rattling in the back of your mind." Silence rang out in the apartment, ending the first portion of the show. Jay was glued to his hands, watching them roll around in his lap. Hailey picked up that she now could say something.

"Please don't take this the wrong way, do you think Jake Miller was able to be saved?"

"What do you mean?" Jay shifted in his spot, the tension right there being bit.

"All that he planned, prepared, executed, was he beyond the typical treatment. I'm not questioning if it was worth trying but.."

"-Was I ever that bad?" She hesitantly nodded, eyes wide as she waited for the backlash.

"In a way, yes. I had issues. Tons of situations sent the red flags flying. I'd walk away from some people or ignore them. Did I want to harm people? No. I knew that to be wrong. But I was certainly scared, nervous to talk to people. It took a really long time to readjust, get back into a normal way of living. In war you operate on someone's call. Whenever, where ever, whatever time you had to be ready to defend yourself. Nothing was ever totally in your control. It was never quiet, there was never peace, everything had to be met with caution and worst case scenarios. So coming home, it took me months to step onto the El, walk down the street at night. Drinking, drugs, fights were the only things that shut my mind up, took away the sights and sounds that felt to be etched in my brain. But do I think Jake could've been saved? Yeah. As long as people are alive, it's worth trying to help them. But the key is they have to want help. It has to be them powering the plan, not anyone else."

"So what made you want to change?" Jay inhaled, determining if he wanted to answer. Hailey didn't budge.

"Um, attending a friend's funeral in Vegas actually. He returned the same time as me, but things spiraled out way worse for him. He ran his car into a wall, his family later found a note somewhere. I realized that as bad off as I was, there were other people out there in far worse states. I was lucky to be alive. We had friends die for us, defend us so we could live. I couldn't waste their sacrifice anymore. At that time my mom had already passed, Will was AWOL, and I wasn't on speaking terms with my dad. It was up to me to get things turned around and I did, for the most part." Hailey opened her arms for a hug and Jay nodded, rolling his eyes over her gesture. He wasn't the hugging it out type, but accepted her invite. It was a lot to dump her, or anyone for that matter. They sat in this weird hugging, sitting position for a couple minutes, Hailey squeezing as Jay sat motionless.

"Thank you for telling me. I'm really proud of you."

"Thanks," Jay said into her shoulder. They separated, both doing that thing where they speak mentally. Jay shrugged, Hailey rubbed his shoulder.

"I'm going to stay here tonight."

"No, I'm fine," Jay argued. Hailey shook her head.

"I don't want you to be alone tonight." Jay's mouth was open, about to protest when she spoke.

"I don't want to wake up tomorrow and find out you wandered the city in your bare feet."

"I haven't done that in awhile," Jay replied.

"Well great, you're not doing it tonight under my watch." She jokingly scooted him off the couch, stretching her tired arms and legs. She knew Adam would be missing her, but Jay's well-being was far more important.

"Go to bed," she nudged. Jay shuffled across the rug, turning to face Hailey as he rested against a doorframe.

"Thanks for this, Hailey." And with that he was in for the night. Hailey stayed awake for another hour, taking in everything Jay told her. Now knowing a small sliver of his life, she was amazed he made it out the front door everyday, much less dove head first into the hectic lifestyle of a Chicago PD detective. She was proud, grateful, lucky to work alongside him. The more she learned, the greater her respect for him blossomed. Tossing and turning could be heard down the hall, soft snores echoing the announcement that Jay was asleep. Hailey joined him in sleepville not long after.

…

"Hailey, we've gotta go." Her hair was a right mess, stiff arms slowly extending upward as Jay stepped away. Her body felt to be fighting a cold, aching as she stood and walked towards the bathroom. She'd never say it, but Jay's couch was the most uncomfortable surface she'd ever slept on.

"Coffee," Jay yelled down the hall? She grunted a 'yes.' The bathroom light revealed a sickly, drained face, puffy eyes and pale cheeks. The quality hours of sleep had to be hovering around three, four tops. She shook her head, reminding herself it was all for Jay as she splashed water on her face, deeply massaging it in an effort to wake up. It wasn't the night she intended to have, but it was better than waking up with uncertainties. After a quick hair brushing and clothes straightening session she ventured back towards the kitchen, smiling as Jay handed her a travel mug.

"Sleep well?"

"Sure," she dug her mouth deep in the lid.

"I should've warned you that couch is awful." Hailey all but spit her coffee at him, making him loudly laugh.

"I accidentally fell asleep on it a couple weeks ago, woke up and was convinced I was paralyzed. That was a rough workday."

"Next time…"

"Huh?!"

"Never mind," she joked, realizing that were aways from that. He looked down at his phone, quickly grabbing his drink and heading for the door.

"Told Voight we'd be there in a couple of minutes." She followed him to the door, watching him lock the door before following him to the car. The sun was just coming through the cracks of the buildings, the wind from the night still present, injecting crispness into their day. Leaves were in the process of changing as school buses were pushing exhaust into the air. Life was just beginning to kick off for the day, the stillness of the nightlife gradually turning over. This was a precious moment of the day, like walking into a restaurant before it opens. Everything is calm, things are relaxed, the potential is ripe. She watched Jay round the truck, smirking at his everything. She loved him as long as she'd known him, waiting for life to give them the green light. They were so similar yet so different, each one being what the other needed. They both had pasts, both had found ways to better days. And as he stared at her funny, she loved this beautiful mess called their life.

"What?"

"Nothing," she replied.

**That beginning felt a little like a college essay; a throwback to those fun times. I should've warned some of this would be heavy. I do apologize for that. I hope you guys enjoyed this. I could not think of a great ending to save my life. I'm so excited for the upcoming season, that our Upstead dreams become reality. Thank you for reading. Onto the next chapter!**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5- Bonded In Blood

**So this one is getting more into my wheelhouse: Jay whump. When I first read this prompt I didn't know if it would be better suited in this story or another one, finally decided to put it here! After all it is about Upstead and them saving each other. **

**_Guest: "Jay get so critically near-death's-doorstop injured on the job that the team gets asked to donate blood and Hailey is the only one whose blood type matches." _**

**So this one if going to be hectic. I want to warn ahead of time that this is a scary, potentially trigger inducing story. It is a humanistic viewpoint of what sadly and tragically is going on in this country right now. This is not going to glorify the act in any such way. The point of this is to show the drastic altering and harm these heinous acts result in. Without any further delay, let's dive in.**

There was happiness. There was laughter. There was unison. The mid-morning sunlight poured through the filtered curtains, the bed's occupants not bothered a bit. It was Sunday after all, everyone's day off. They spent the morning catching up on the lack of sleep from the night before. They'd been doing this dance for some time now, one going over to the other's on the weekend. Both wanted to keep the relationship under wraps for the time being, neither of them ready to go public on their personal lives. Especially since both had done this before, they knew to keep things hidden for as long as possible. They awoke this morning much later than normal, looking to each other and smiling before completing last night's unfinished business. It all started with a kiss, ending with both of them out of breath. She loved him, he adored her, the day seemed to have nothing but positive things on the agenda. That all changed at the interval buzzing of a phone.

"Is that mine," Jay whispered between kisses? Hailey giggled as she rolled over, looking to the bedside table for the device. Her forehead scrunched, ending the thing they were doing.

"It's both of ours." She handed Jay his phone as she opened her messages. Before long both their bodies were flying out of bed, destination clothes and the door.

"I'll call Voight," Jay yelled in the closet, Hailey nodding as she threw her hair into a ponytail and quickly brushed her teeth. She could hear bits and pieces of the call, Jay using words like 'active' and 'multiple' and 'automatic rifles.' It wasn't like Hailey to get nervous before these things, but she couldn't shake the worry out of her as she headed for the door. She was baffled that Jay could talk and think on his feet at a time like this, but then she remembered he'd done this numerous times. They both hesitated at the front door, Hailey looking to Jay and telling him the thing.

"They're not going to care or notice if we show up together. We've gotta go." Under different circumstances she'd have protested, insisted on some other plan. But lives were literally at stake and needing their help. The door slammed behind them as they jogged down the hall. So much for that untapped potential of happiness.

The ride over was quiet at first, but as they inched closer to the scene an uptick in ambulances, police cars, and running people made everyone's skin crawl. A stroke of luck had them storing their gear and guns in the truck last night, saving them that much time in getting to the scene. Two blocks out traffic came to a stop. Barricades from the festival were slowly being moved, backing traffic up for quite a ways. They sat in the car tapping their feet, scoffing and honking as a random person or cluster of people sprinted down the street, eyes wide with terror and panic.

"Get out," Jay told Hailey, putting the truck in park and gathering his necessary things. People were freaking out, yelling at them for leaving the truck in the street. Jay mumbled that they'd thank him later. Moving in combative fashion their trek to the terror was slow, but productive. They were about a block away when the first spatter of gunfire registered in their ears. Hailey literally stopped, realizing this wasn't some story or idea, what was happening just down the way was real. The terrible, hateful, evil floating around the country had found her city, their city. If nothing else, they had to stop it before more innocent lives were forever changed. Jay nudged her, telling her to sprint but be on the lookout. He took a couple steps ahead of her before she moved, going against the common sense to run away. It was an out-of-body experience but one she was trained for. She breathed and bolted, just focusing on keeping up with him.

What they rounded the corner to was something neither of them would forget. Destruction of all kinds lay at their feet. The more you observed the more your stomach turned. Earth was moved from missed targets. It smelled of sulfur and blood. The air was thick, suffocating as they wove through the festival grounds. Screaming, praying, pleading created a wave of noise, cops yelling and thoroughly waving for people to leave. It was all so much that you wanted to kneel down and plug your ears. Hailey helplessly looked to her left and right, feeling like a single ant in a pile of human feet. There was so much harm, too many places to dart to, it was the sound of Jay's yelling voice and the near miss bullet that brought her back down to the job. Get the shooter, help those behind you later.

"Get behind a tree," Jay yelled, continuing in the direction of the shooter as Hailey darted. Jay's gun was raised upwards, quickly figuring out the shooter was in a building. Bullets were still whizzing by, either hitting the ground, a structure, or worse. The speed was so quick you could hear it when it got close, almost like a baseball being pitched at a high rate. Hailey raised her gun when there was a break, sprinting to another perch before the next round began. The radio was a stream of crackled voices and half commands, everyone getting that they had to move into a building, at least get a sniper in position to take the shooter out.

"I'll do it," Jay calmly spoke over the radio, getting instructions and sniper rifle preferences as he rose from his crouch. Hailey wasn't near him when he made the call, but she'd never forget watching his head pop up from nowhere. He took a step, and another, before retreating for higher ground. He didn't get a chance to turn around because in the amount of time to inhale his body rocked backward, Hailey watching in horror as his limp body fell to the ground.

"JAY!" She yelled, ignoring the trouble that lay between the two of them. She holstered her gun and bolted, zig zagging across the green space before sliding on top of him. The blood was already seeping out, his body shaking from the shock and trauma. His eyes were trying to close, the stubborn determination keeping him conscious for the time being.

"10-1 officer down. I repeat my partner's been shot. Get another sniper up there and take this guy out." The dispatcher emotionlessly replied, Hailey ignoring it as she pressed to the source of his bleeding, hard. It was in a critical area, Hailey not succeeding in pushing away the thoughts that Jay wouldn't make it off this ground alive. People were still running away from the shooter's aim, shouts and bullets coming within earshot of Hailey but none of it bothered her.

"You are not going out like this," she yelled to Jay, his response a half hearted smirk. The breathing was now sporadic, chest sounds gurgling out of him at a record rate. Tears were dripping down her face as she bent over to kiss his cheek. Their final moments together were incredible and memorable, but she prayed they weren't the last. There was so much left for them do to, life moments that had to include him. She looked up to see he'd closed his eyes, pretty much summing up the incoming events. She smacked the side of his face, sobbing as the hand mark reddened his unconscious face. Someone yelled for her to duck and she did, praying her body weight would be the thing that kept him alive just a moment longer.

…

There was a spilt second moment right after the shooting ceased. People slowly crawled out from the wreckage and dirt, taking a breath before assessing what they just endured. It was the span of a second, but felt to be several hours. Hailey had closed her eyes when the shooting became overwhelming, gradually opening her eyes to grief. People were clinging to their loved ones, sobbing into them as they pleaded for help. Those who weren't injured were up and running, arms waving for paramedics' assistance. Cops were in the process of feeling for pulses, rubbing their faces as they surveyed the damaged, fractured city. A quiet gag from the person under her is what made her leap off, breathe the smallest sigh of relief.

"That's right, Jay. Let it all out. I'm right here." His eyes weren't open but his body was still breathing, still doing it's best to stay alive for her. A hand was pressed into his chest again, instilling more pain and discomfort but she didn't care. As long as he was unhappy he was awake and alive. Her gaze returned to the world in front of her. There were many stories here, so many paths that met at this place and time. Whatever else happened today they'd all have something in common, this terror riddled moment. Hailey cried at the thought of that, taking the whole thing in and feeling selfish. People were far worse off than Jay, some were younger and needing help before him. As a pair of medics raced to her place on the green space part of her felt guilty. One person wasn't more valuable than a crowd of people. It was only when she saw several fleets of help that she turned back to her partner.

"What," she asked?

"How long has he been unconscious?" One medic was setting up an IV while the other was ripping the vest and shirt off, vomit filling Hailey's mouth as the hole and dark blood were put on display for the first time.

"A couple minutes, tops," she replied.

"Intubate," the other medic asked?

"Bag for right now. We need to roll him." One of the medics took the head, Hailey and the remaining medic took his side and rolled. He let out a small grunt as they did, revealing the lack of a hole on the back.

"It's still in there. Get him on the gurney. You coming?" Hailey was startled, still taking in things to noticed Jay was lifted from the ground and strapped onto a gurney. The medic called for her again before her head reconnected with things.

"Yeah, I'm coming." She was jogging, doing her best to not get caught up in the images they were running past. Her focus was Jay's head, watching him be maneuvered through the triage location and thrown into the back of an ambulance. Hailey's foot was on the step when Voight found her. He was at a corner of a building, head swiveling to find his people. He was shouting but Hailey couldn't hear him. She looked at him and he must've felt her gaze. The medic was yelling for her to get in when she nodded the confirmation. They were gone before Hailey could plant her rear end on the bench. She was doing well till they past the truck, looking out the window to see Adam and Atwater moving the vehicle out of the way, neither of them aware who was residing in the ambulance.

…

The hospital was absolute pandemonium, which is entirely understandable. It's a well known fact that hospitals are sparsely staffed on the weekends. Most surgeons have the weekend off and the rotation of doctors and nurses are expanded during this time, creating a single unit working one full or half weekend. So when Jay and Hailey arrived to Med the scene was both comical and gut wrenching. Doctors were dressed in athletic wear or t-shirt and jeans with scrubs over them, looking to be lost in a sea of injured or passed, spinning around trying to do a million things at once. When the doors opened on the rig it was April, Maggie and Choi that greeted them. No one had told them who was coming nor was it important. With all that had gone down everyone was getting the same treatment: assessing and sending to their necessary locations. But they were allowed to react and they very much did.

"Hailey? What happened."

"Gun shot wound to the chest, unconscious at the scene. Lost at least a couple of liters. On a mask and fluids…" The medic went on to spit out numbers Hailey didn't understand. She watched the crowd of people push Jay into the ED, listening to them yell for people to make room as they started calling for tests and surgeons to be en route. Hailey was frozen in place, the shakiness of realization zapping any notion of movement out of her. She kept seeing faces, hearing screams, feeling the bullets graze past her. Jay's face and yelling brought things down a bit, giving her something worth moving for. That and the medic running back with a gurney reminding her they had to leave is what finally got her out. She stood in the doorway, looking at everyone being treated. They were like zombies, lost souls who had been pulled from the edge. Shock, fear, terror, emptiness were plastered on their faces. Medical personnel would talk to them, point them in the direction of where they needed to go and they wouldn't move. Some buckled down in tears, but all of them weren't totally aware of what happened to them, what they survived that morning. It was Will streaking past Hailey and turning to face a trauma room that Hailey remembered she was just like everyone else: shocked and horrified while not knowing what all went down.

"Oh crud," she breathed, slowly walking to meet an obviously upset Will. Maggie had left Jay's room and was filling him in on all she knew. Will nodded but wouldn't break eye contact with the room. Hailey was a couple steps away when Will went limp for a moment, both women swopping in to help him. Hailey wanted to inquire, understand what Jay was going through and what was ahead but figured Will didn't need to hear the words again. She gave Maggie a look and she nodded, confirming something bad.

"I'm going in," Will announced after a moment, sliding the glass door open to allow the sounds of heart monitors, shouts, and the defibrillator to pour into the ED. The curtain was closed, shielding Jay from the gathering crowd. Will's opening of the green sheet provided a millisecond look, revealing a nearly naked, intubated Jay who looked right next to death. He was lifeless, pale, and covered in his own blood. Hailey shuttered as the curtain closed behind Will.

"How bad," she numbly asked?

"The bullet hit a chamber of his heart and grazed a couple of major arteries. Rhodes had to perform a thoracotomy just to access the heart and has the holes plugged. It's kind of a miracle he's made it this working on getting his volume up and stabilized enough to bring him upstairs."

"Shit," Hailey exhaled, doubling over to rest her hands on her legs. Maggie went to rubbing her back as the two women watched and listened and waited.

…

There was blood everywhere, that's what Will first noticed. The second was how bad off Jay was. With the amount of blood he lost his skin was white bordering on blue. He bypassed the chest, not wanting to pass out in front of his brother, and focus on the head. He wasn't conscious and had a breathing tube in place. Choi and Rhodes were piggy backing the chest compression and electrical shocks, one yelling clear while the other made sure people stepped away. The heart rate was sporadic, fluttering between very high numbers and the single sound of a ceased heart. The rib spreader forcing a side of Jay's chest open was enough to make Will want to puke, but he put his energy elsewhere, finding the shoes still on Jay's feet and latching on. That was going to be his way out, the thing he'd keep in his view till Jay was brought upstairs. With the chaos in the room no one noticed Will's presence until things took another turn.

Jay was breathing with the vent, not fighting or going over it. But then gagging came out of his asleep body, the oxygen levels suddenly dropping below the minimum levels. People weren't noticing except for Will, and rightfully so. The heart in that moment was more important than anything else. Will watched the number slip from 89 to 87, 86 to 83. It was when it hit 80 that he had no choice but to speak up.

"He's not breathing." Everyone shot a look in his direction, none of them being happy to see Will in the room.

"Will, you have to get out."

"No way," Will shook his head, leaving the foot of Jay's bed and venturing to the spot of the latest trouble. He felt along Jay's neck to realize it was tight, dare he thought swollen. None of this was a good thing.

"He's constricting around the tube to the point it's swelling." Rhodes looked to Choi who threw his head back in frustration. Nothing Jay did was half tilt.

"We're going to have to trache him." Will knew this was the next step, closing his eyes as he heard the confirmation. He deflated the balloon and quickly yanked the device out of his brother's mouth. For a moment he looked normal, now looking more asleep and less like he was dying. He extended his hand for the scalpel, knowing how to perform the invasive, minor operation. A nurse hesitated, looking to Rhodes to force Will out of the way.

"Will, you can't do that and you know it."

"You guys are busy and I can do it." Rhodes clamped something in Jay's chest, ripping off dirty gloves and applying new ones.

"You can watch," he instructed Will as he prepped the base of the neck and removed the rubber cover from the knife. Will dug under the sheets, cords, and IV lines to find Jay's hand, squeezing as the scalpel dug into the neck, blood running out as Rhodes punctured a hole in the trachea.

"It's almost done," Will informed Jay as Rhodes stuck the breathing tube into the location. A strap was placed around the neck and gauze was placed around the still bleeding hole, but their efforts awarded them something they struggled some time for: sinus rhythm.

"We're moving," Rhodes shouted as he grabbed a side of the gurney and ran. The curtain was thrown back in dramatic fashion as Will rolled the glass door out of the way. Hailey's jaw dropped to the floor as Jay raced by her, Will shaking his head as he followed Jay and the team to the elevator.

"Don't give up," he told Jay as he was pushed onto the car and the doors slid shut. For reasons unknown to him Will felt that that was the end, the final time. He watched the numbers climb to the OR floor, closing his eyes as he prayed for what was the next event in Jay's future. Tears were dripping down his face as he returned to face Hailey and Maggie.

"Had to perform a tracheotomy, his throat was swelling around the tube and he couldn't breathe." Hailey nodded, looking down at her blood and tear stained appearance.

"What can I do to help?" Will shrugged, asking himself that very same question.

"He'll need blood. I'm sure after today the blood bank will be low."

"Let's get you cleaned up first," Maggie commented, showing Hailey the way to the showers and clothing. Hailey turned to face Will and give smiling a full effort. She knew things were grim, fully understood the emotions and scenarios that were running through his head. It was a sad smile, but a smile nonetheless. He nodded before turning away to face the waiting crowd, hoping for something to distract him from his misery for a time.

…

The shower was glorious. Its' magical healing powers draped over her like a hug, washing away the stench of the day and filling her with peaceful cleanliness. She began standing right under the shower head, closing her eyes and breathing loudly. She wasn't aware of how clenched and tight she'd become, her whole body doing a giant exhale as the water ran down her. She stood long enough to wash herself with soap and shampoo, rising them all as she collapsed into a pile on the tile floor. The once amazing water head became an audible reminder of the day, the water drops sounding more like shots and shouts rather than what it was. Closing her eyes only brought back the prior night's and early morning's activities. She could see him, feel him like he was a couple feet away from her. His scent was right at the tip of her nose, his laugh making her smile against the rainfall above. Her drained mind told her to reach out and touch him, the waking eyes revealing an extended hand hanging in mid air. The tears were there but she pushed them away. She'd done the grieving girlfriend routine already, now it was time to be the supportive, protective partner. If the day taught her anything it's that life can change in the blink of an eye. You can go from living on the peak, thinking life wouldn't get any better, to playing a game of 'lasts.' Last looks, last images, last words danced in her mind. Hands were brought to her face, an extra loud grunt and growl erupting out of her. But then a door slammed open, bringing the pity party and misery mindset to a halt.

"Hailey, you ok?" Maggie outline could be made out against the frosted glass door. She looked to be standing a couple feet away from the shower. Hailey rose from her spot on the floor, nodding as her hand turned the faucet to the off position.

"Yeah."

"I could only find scrubs. I can go get you some clothing later but this is all I have right now." Hailey smirked, loving the dedication and love this women shared with the world. Amongst the worst day in the city, this women made the time to look out for her, a bystander who wasn't physically effected by the crime.

"It's perfect, thank you," Hailey replied, throwing her hair in a towel before wrapping another one around her body. She opened the door to a mute Maggie, her face not looking more hopeful than the last time they interacted.

"Did Jay make it to the OR." Maggie nodded her head.

"They started him bypass about half an hour ago. Will's already up in the waiting room."

"What surgery is he having?" Maggie hesitated, mouth open but not sure if she should speak.

"You know what, I don't want to know. It won't help things." Maggie nodded in agreement.

"Why don't you get dressed and I'll bring you to the blood bank." Hailey took the clothing and changed, feeling the weight of Jay being somewhere in the hospital with his heart stopped and in the process of being cut open. Not a great thought to marinate on.

Once the re-dressing process was complete Hailey followed Maggie out of the room for an eternal journey to the blood bank. It was a series of stair climbing, elevator riding, and about a million hallway trails, but eventually they arrived at the large, glass encased department. It was divided into two parts: donation and storage. The storage was a series of rowed refrigerators, the room dark and occupied by one. The other side, the donation section, was jam packed with people. Nurses were darting between donors, checking IV lines and blood bags while setting up new people. As Hailey and Maggie ventured closer to the department Hailey choked on tears of joy. All of Intelligence was there, staggered between checking in and in the process of donating. When they saw her they nodded, seeming to be telling her there wasn't another option, they were doing it for Jay.

"I'll see you when you're done," Maggie told Hailey, this being the passing of her to able hands. She nodded, not hesitating to fill out the paperwork. She sat in the waiting room for minutes, springing to her feet when her name was called. The nurse guided her to a place at the end of the line, placing her a couple spots away from Adam. He looked over to her and bit the side of his cheek, shrugging as she made herself comfortable.

"I'll be right back," a nurse quietly told her. Hailey noticed the blood bag next to her chair, a Sharpie resting next to it. Without thinking Hailey took the marker and drew a smiley face in the upper left hand corner, a calling card for whoever received her donation. Adam chuckled when she put the bag back on the table.

"Have you heard anything," he asked her?

"In surgery."

"How are you doing?" Hailey shrugged, truly touched by his concern for her well being. Just because they weren't together didn't mean they still didn't care about each other. His simple question spoke volumes.

"Honestly, I don't know." Before the long the nurse returned, set up the IV and smirked at the smiling face on the bag. She told Hailey it would be awhile before stepping away to tend to the others.

"He'll pull through," Adam encouraged. Without even realizing it Hailey nodded to sleep, the serotonin finally having its' way with her.

…

She awoke to Kim nudging her, flinching her arms up as the woman stepped away giggling. Sleep did not treat her well. It was a never ending video reel of her time with Jay. From the moment she walked into that bank heist to the what they did last night, the two and a half years they spent together became a marathon movie in her mind. Try as hard as she did to push those things away, that's what her brain told her to watch, there was no other viewing option. So Kim's encouragement to return to earth was out of nowhere but welcomed, finally ending the worst movie in the history of the world. Hailey woke to an empty room with the lights turned down. The nurse that helped her was in the far right corner of the room, putting things away before looking to Kim, telling her she was leaving in a couple of minutes.

"How long was I out," Hailey yawned?

"At least four hours." Eyes went wide, shocked and amazed she was out that long despite the day. Kim offered a hand and Hailey accepted, the two women leaning on each other as they wove back into the heart of the hospital. It was when they boarded the elevator that Hailey noticed the OR floor wasn't selected, a sign that things had changed right under her sound asleep nose.

"Is he out of surgery?"

"Yeah, not too long ago. Rhodes already talk to Will and they're upstairs with Jay. He's in the ICU right now. Might need another operation in a couple of days."

"Why?"

"I'll let Will tell you. Didn't really understand the first time I heard it." Hailey's chest tightened when the elevator stopped, her pulse picking up when the doors opened. She wasn't sure if she was ready or able to see Jay in this place, in a state other than conscious and normal. But that wasn't for her to dictate. The act had already been done. Jay had held his end of the bargain up for now, it was her turn to deliver regardless if she like it or not. Kim sensed her resistance, taking Hailey by the arm and slowly walking her down the hallway. The nurses and doctors at the nurses' station nodded to them, realizing who they were up there for. They didn't speak, just pointed them in the direction. Another step, another turn and they were there. The crowd in the room was the dead give away, the redheaded person hovering over the bed the final piece to the puzzle. After hours of fear and uncertainty the reunion was upon them.

"You ready?"

"Yeah," Hailey replied. The door was slid open, the sea of people was parted, and there he was looking just as beat up and dead as the last time they saw each other.

For starters his lips were a light shade of blue. This had to do with the trache tube. While the rest of him was being oxygenated his lips and nose were being overpowered by the tube, creating a lower but acceptable oxygen supply. The rest of him was sickly white, like he hadn't seen sunlight in a good year. Hailey moved from the foot of his bed to the side Will wasn't occupying. She felt the stares, knew this was the time the secret would be revealed to the world, but all of that seemed stupid and minuscule. Jay was alive for the time being, by the looks of it that wouldn't last very long. She pointed to the hand covered in pulse oximeter clips, IVs, and hospital bands and Will nodded, Hailey cupping its' limpness in her hand and squeezing. It didn't respond but it was his, that was going to have to be enough for now. His chest was fairly exposed, a hospital gown draped over it and resting about halfway down, revealing the large gauze dressing and numerous drainage tubes coming from the surgical sight. Hailey didn't stay there long, not wanting to see that part of him for awhile. She did a quick once over, concluding he looked so completely different from the morning. The once strong and able body was now fragile, thin, and foreign to her. His smell was replaced with sterile, hospital things. His appearance had been wrecked by the day's events. The world outside was pitch black now, Hailey realized they began the day full of happiness, ending it with nothing but heartbreak.

"What happened," fell out of her mouth before she even registered it. Will looked to Rhodes, who was documenting things and ordering medication. He looked up from his job and breathed, realizing none of them wanted to hear the report again.

"The bullet hit a chamber of his heart and injured a couple big arteries. We were able to repair the damage and remove the bullet but his heart is not pumping as quick as I'd like. That might be because of the blood loss but it's likely because of the trauma. We're going to give him transfusions for the next two days and then reevaluate. If it doesn't improve we'll go back in and try to fix the smaller arteries, maybe do a pace maker." Hailey nodded, not understanding things but was relieved Rhodes didn't speak in endpoints. One by one members of Intelligence trickled out of the room. The case was still wide open, questions outnumbering the answers. While they all wanted to stay for the duration duty was calling. The best way they could help Jay was to solve the case, knowing full well he'd want answers when he woke up. Before long it was just Will and Hailey, listening to the ventilator breathe and the heart monitors beeping the scary tune of a sick heart.

"This was the longest, worst day ever," Will announced, leaning back in his seat and rubbing eyes. Hailey looked up to the IV stand, smirking at the blood bag smiling back at her. She finally got her moment to help Jay.

"Yeah, but not just for us," Hailey replied, both of them staring out into the ICU, noticing the packed rooms and hallways of those who also started the day blissfully unaware their lives would forever change.

…

_Five Days Later_

"Hey there sleepy, welcome back." She sat at the right side of the bed, holding his hand as his eyes slowly wound around the room. The last couple of days were trying. Jay did in fact have to have the second surgery, a second open heart procedure in just as many days. Enduring one procedure was tough, but having to go through twice in two days was rarely done. Despite the transfusions, rest, and medication nothing availed, the heart doing its' own thing. After the second operation Rhodes warned that the pain would be pretty excruciating. Breaking and spreading the sternum open once is bad, but having do to it twice is like having multiple layers of bruises. Jay would be unable to move any of his upper half for a couple of weeks and the muscle strength would be all but gone. But the end game was that he would wake up and get out of the hospital. Not if, not maybe, he would; which those who huddled over him relished in for the foreseeable future.

You could say he opened his eyes the day after the second surgery, but wasn't alive per say. They were quick couple second blinks, the eyes watery and lost as they went around the room before snapping shut. This went on over the coming days, everyone soon figuring out it was the wearing off of the pain meds that stirred him from his slumber. A couple of times he'd grunt or whine, but the trache put that to a halt. Hailey and Will never left the room during this time. Their goal was for Jay to never feel alone. The chances of him remembering any of this part of the recovery was slim, but on the off chance he did they never wanted his first moments on the other side to be alone. What made today different from the other days was that we coughed, stopping the vent for a moment. Hailey was reading while Will was talking to Rhodes when it occurred. Hailey shot around to face him, smile beaming wide as Jay closed his eyes while mouthing something. She called to Will as she took her spot on the bed, waiting for their eyes to finally reconnect.

"Hey," she spoke again as Jay found her, Jay returned her hand squeezing with a flinch. It was small and weak but it was him. She'd never been so proud.

"Can you hear me? Blink if you can." Jay slowly closed his eyes once before opening, staring at her rather helplessly and tired.

"You're in the hospital. You were shot almost a week ago and were brought here. Rhodes had to operate twice but you'll be ok. Don't move anything, I'm sure it hurts." Jay blinked, letting the smallest, goofiest smirk out of the corner of his mouth.

"You also can't talk," Will chimed in.

"There's a tube in your throat but it'll come out in a couple of days. How bad is the pain. Do you want another dose?" Jay nodded, wincing at the pain that caused. Will got up to get the nurse and Conner, leaving Hailey and Jay alone for a moment. The drugs were taking a toll on his functions, causing him to daze off before slowly blinking back to reality. On one of his resurfaces he looked to Hailey, giving her that 'explain' stare and knowing exactly what he meant.

"They got him. It was political. Same thing as El Paso and Dayton." Jay looked off again, Hailey noticing the tears in the corner of his eyes. She took the sleeve of her shirt and gently wiped, Jay blinked his thanks.

"I love you," she blurted out. Jay instantly looked at her frozen, surprised face. She knew this wasn't the time or place to confess these things, but it didn't matter. She almost lost him, their story was nearly incomplete. Screw the rules and timelines, they had this moment and she planned on making the most of it.

"You too," he mouthed. It wasn't the full sentence but Hailey knew the two words required a lot of work right now. She leaned over and kissed his forehead, returning to her spot to hear Jay totally zonked out.

**So if you want to read more in depth and crazy Jay whump, you can head over to A Prompting- Jay Halstead. Please forgive my shameless plug. I hope you guys enjoyed this one! It didn't exactly follow the prompt but the points were put in the story nonetheless. Next chapter won't be as crazy as this but will definitely have more Upstead fun. Thank you for reading! Onto the next one.**


End file.
